Bits of my thoughts

Have a full head tonight. Should have been asleep a while ago but an overly busy mind, hot cocoa, and a cold house is keeping me awake right now.

One of my writing projects, that has been mostly a concept and some outlines of early chapters and character sketches so far, took a weird twist in my head tonight and went from being a coming-of-age story to something far more bizarrely wide-ranging. It actually works a lot better too, it removes some of the weird conceptual blinders I had been wearing in regards to how it would work and suddenly became more interesting again. I think it may ultimately end up being the thing that swallows up a couple other fantasy writing projects I had started and ties it into one semi-cohesive whole. Still trying to shake the entire thing out of my head and see how the pieces line up.

One of the other odd writing ideas I have has been interesting me again. Sci-Fi in the old-school sense of the word. Bladerunner'esque I suppose you could call it, though more so the movie then the book. One of those interesting questions I wonder about, especially in regards to who I am, is the nature of identity and personality. Are we defined by our memories, our actions, others expectations of how we are to behave, or something else altogethor. The subject interests me as I know that to a large degree my life, and who I am, is shaped by a few very distinct events which leaves me often wondering who I would be if any of those events hadn't occurred.

My guide site is still making progress slowly. I have a bunch of stuff I need to process and get up onto it now. Progress has been slower then I could hope, but it is coming along.

Thirty-two days until I fly a timezone away to meet a bunch of friends who I have never met in person, and whom of which I have only spoken to a couple of before.

Twenty-two more days until the end of the year and I have to look back at the last year and wonder what I accomplished. I hate both my birthday and New Years. They are endings, and while I know that means at the same time they are also beginnings, it is the ending of the year, and the end of a chance to get everything done I wanted to get done in that year, which tears at me.

My head is emptier now. I return to my hot cocoa, my notepad, and watching Gundam Wing on DVD until my house warms enough at last that I can sleep without worrying that my ears will freeze off in the night.